lambing at kislap ng iyong mga mata

it's friday once again!  and it's march already! and it's lent season!  

last thursday my mom texted me saying "tapos na ang feb, malapit na ang pasko".  and i had to reply back, "baka pasko ng pagkabuhay hehehe". 

but it's true anyway.  before we know it we'll be hearing chrismas songs again.

-o0o-

yesterday, our team had a meeting at this massive room that was really meant for training.  for some reason, training ended early so we (15 lang kami) found ourselves using the room.  anyway,  while we were about to start the meeting i fondly remembered meetings held at eastwestbank.  that was a bit absurd because for the past year that i've been working here, i never associated my meetings at eastwest to here in DOCS.   but yesterday i did...and you know what i missed?  eating kropek or fish crackers during meetings inside our training room in gil puyat.  hah!

-o0o-

i have finally found my bearings!

after two weeks of being nostalgic, i have finally found my strength and bearings back.  a big factor would have something to do with me and my husband finalizing our concrete plans for the year.  okay, i'm really weird when it comes to things like this.  i'm a very goal-oriented person...i need to have direction...i want concrete goals with matching action plans and time frame.  thank god my husband indulged me last friday night---we had our planning session over the phone!!!! yay!  come saturday, i felt really better and i had to celebrate by having starbucks for breakfast.  great!  i'm normal again.

other than that, i would have to thank friends who welcomed me back to the arms of sydney.  these are my angels here talking sense into me, making me realize that being here in sydney is indeed a blessing and that i'm lucky to be here.  don't get me wrong, i never really forget that, i know in my heart that i'm lucky to be here and i'm glad i am.  i just need to be reminded i guess.  when you wallow, you don't get to think of nice things really.   so thank you so much, i hope you know who you are.

-o0o-

i'm lagging behind with the uploading of photos :( 

i know friends are waiting out there, my apologies.  now that i'm back on my feet, i'm gonna be better---more photos coming out soon!

-o0o-

life is short.

this week, i was in shocked to learn that a former workmate of ours in east west bank passed away.  she was not a closed friend of mine but we have shared a couple of happy moments during training.  i was lucky that i had been showered by her light while i was working there.  she will truly be missed!

on my way home, i realized that i'm in that age wherein people not only get married and have children, but can possibly die too.  events like this taught me that life is indeed so short and there are lessons to be learned:

• love yourself and love all the people around you.  say it and show it.


• be healthy.  in mind, heart and body.


• share your blessings...not only to your friends but moreso to people that are less fortunate.


• be rich in experiences and not in wealth.


• be kind. smile often. forget anger. forgive.


• make the most of each day and be grateful too.


• pray and always always always have faith. 


• be at peace with yourself and with everything around you.  learn to accept things you can't change.


• stay happy!  it is a choice.


• remember that LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL...in everything you do, have fun!

vision of a sunset
photo courtesy of chris sanchez

COFFEE CUP

COFFEE CUP is my first attempt at still life photography.  and like any other love in a lifetime, the first one will always have a special place in my heart. 

why a cup of coffee?  because coffee is one of my passions.

why max brenner?  because it was the first coffee i drank when i arrived in manila.

it's all about firsts =)

// posted by ibyangbabe @ 8:30 AM 0 Comments

miss ko na mag-tagalog!!!!!  nami-miss kong magsalita ng tagalog mula umaga hanggang gabi.  at kahit papagalitan ako ng asawa ko pag nabasa nya to, aaminin ko na ring miss ko na ang mag-mura sa tagalog. 

singit na kwento: isa sa mga bad habits ko ay ang pagmumura, although hindi halata dahil
tactful naman ako sa pagsasalita ko at refined naman ako madalas (hehehe).  nakakapagmura lang ako pag nae-excite, nagugulat, natataranta o nagagalit.   pero kamakailan lang (about 4 hours ago), mariin akong pinagbawalan ng asawa ko na magmura at seryoso pa nya akong pinag-promise.  nag-overseas call pa sya para pagbawalan
ako kaya naman mega-promise na ako.  sayang naman ang bayad sa long distance call ng pobre kung di ko susundin diba? at di pa natapos dun. pagbaba ng telepono, maya-maya lang ay nag-text pa para ipaalala ang promise na ginawa ko.  di rin sya makulit no?

anyway, mabalik tayo sa emote ko...kung alam ko lang na mami-miss ko ang pagta-tagalog ngayong nandito na ako,  dumaldal na sana ako ng husto nung nasa pilipinas ako.  dumaldal
na sana ako hanggang sa mawalan ako ng boses.

natatandaan ko tuloy na nung dumating ako sa pinas, yung iba kong kaibigan,  hinihintay nila akong magsalita ng ingles kasi gusto nilang malaman kung may aussie accent na daw ako.  ang iba pa nga, nagpa-sample pa. pero ang sabi ko, wag na.  ang accent na hinihintay nilang marinig ay kusang lumalabas lalo na kung ang kausap ko ay taga-aussie rin.  kahit sa mga pinsan kong taga-aussie at america, naging filipino accent ang english ko.  kasi feel na feel ko kasi na nasa pilipinas ako.  at feel na feel ko na ako lang ang super-duper filipino sa aming magpipinsan.  at proud ako dyan :)

-o0o-

mga bagay na hindi ko nagawa nang magbakasyon sa pilipinas:
- kumain sa bizu
- kumain sa cheesecake, etc.
- magpunta sa enchanted kingdom
- makipag-reunion sa mga barkada ko sa Greenheights
- kumain madalas sa mcdo, kfc at jollibee
- kumain sa goldilocks
- makapaglaro ng badminton
- makapunta sa baywalk at malate area (i miss cafe adriatico)
- makapunta sa monasterio ni sta.clara
- makabili ng postcards ng manila, boracay at cebu
- magpunta sa embassy o absinthe---o kahit saang bar :(
- gumimik sa timog o tomas morato,  hanggang cubao lang ang inabot ko
- makita si marga na anak ni teng na inaanak ni chris
- makita si ponkie na anak ni vince na inaanak ko
- makita si gab na anak ni armi na inaanak ko
- bumili ng cocktail dresse(s) sa petit monde (ang daming magaganda!)
- ipagluto ng spaghetti si chris
- makapag-gym kahit isang beses lang
- mag-lunch sa Circles, Makati Shangri-la
- mag-dinner sa Prince of Jaipur
- kumain sa tapa king
- kumain ng chicharon ng lapids
- magtipid (hehehe)

-o0o-

mga nami-miss ko ngayon na nandito na uli ako:
- nanay at tatay ko syempre
- mga "hane" ko, mga kaibigan, kabarkada, ka-gimikan
- wedding team ko na naging kaibigan ko na rin
- mga alaga naming aso na si twinkle at kyla--na parang kapatid na ang turing ko
- pagsasalita ng tagalog
- magsalita na parang bading (nasal, sa ilong ang labas ng salita)
- starbucks
- coffee bean and tea leaf
- adobo ng nanay ko
- mga text messages (sa pinas ang daming nagte-text sa akin)
- max brenner (hindi maganda ang max brenner dito)
- cheeseburger mcdo, jollibee chickenjoy at hot 'n crispy ng kfc
- tapsilog
- boracay!!!!!
- mga pinsan ko na sana ay parati na lang kaming magkakasama                                         - makati (i love makati)
- iced tea
- green mango juice
- max's lumpiang prito
- polvoron
- pagiging accessible ng mga salon at spa
- shopping!!!!!
- pagiging accessible sa kahit anong lugar dahil may taxi, jeep, bus, mrt, lrt, tricycle  at de-padyak
- fishballs at samalamig, taho, sisig, manggang hilaw
- shakey's pizza
- kumuha ng litrato (hanggang ngayon di pa rin ako humahawak ng camera)

at para sa grand finale, siyempre miss ko ang asawa ko.

-o0o-

marami pa akong gustong isulat, gustong ikwento.  gusto kong ibahagi ang mga preparasyon namin para mabuo ng aming wedding at mga nangyari nung wedding, ang honeymoon, at mga hindi namin makakalimutang moments nung bakasyon namin sa pinas.  sasamahan ko pa ito ng mga pictures.

sa isang linggo, sisimulan ko yan isa-isa.  sana masubaybayan nyo (lalo na ng mga kaibigan ko) ang mga kwento ko.

grabe, marami-rami rin yun talaga ha?  pero dahil gusto kong ma-share sa inyo gagawin ko.

panghuli: sa mga pinsan kong gustong makabasa nitong entry na ito, maghanap
na lang kayo ng pinoy na pwedeng magbasa at mag-translate para sa inyo.

-o0o-

biyernes na uli!  ang bilis din ng isang linggo (lalo na kung busy).  bukas, one week na pala ako dito sa sydney.    thank god i was able to survive my first week back (sorry
hirap tagalugin eh).  one of these days, the sun will shine brighter again for me.

 

i got this from a forwarded email...

When you were only 5 years old, I said, "I love you."
You asked me, "What is it?"

When you were 15 years old, I said, "I love you."
You blushed... You looked down and smiled...

When you were 20 years old, I said, "I love you."
You put your head on my shoulder and hold my hand...
afraid that I might disappear...

When you were 25 years old, I said, "I love you."
You prepared breakfast and served it in front of me,
and kissed my forehead saying, "You'd better be quick,
it's gonna be late."

When you were 30 years old, I said, "I love you."
You said, "If you really love me, please come back
early after work."

When you were 40 years old, I said, "I love you."
You were cleaning the dining table and said,
"OK dear, but it's time for you to help our children their revision..."

When you were 50 years old, I said, I love you."
You were knitting and you laughed at me :-D

When you were 60 years old, I said, "I love you."
You smiled at me :-)

When you were 70 years old, I said, "I love you."
We sat on the rocking chair with our glasses on.
I was reading your love letter that you sent me 50 years ago...
with our hand crossing together...

When you were 80 years old, you said you loved me!
I didn't say anything but cried...
That day must have been the happiest day of my life!
Because you said you loved me!!!

Please appreciate your loved ones..
Say, "I love you," to them today!

[I love you] means I really care for you......
I'm really concerned...
When you're not around... I miss you a lot...
When you're beside me, I do feel better and happy.

Say it out but not to expect the return or anything...
Do not hide your feeling as you may regret it someday.

 

TODAY, HUG YOUR LOVED ONES TIGHTER

AND TELL THEM HOW MUCH YOU LOVE THEM...

HAPPY HEARTS DAY!

i arrived this morning via singapore airlines, and with me are tons and tons of memories of our vacation in the phils, our lovely wedding last jan 20 and honeymoons in boracay, bohol, cebu and hongkong.  so many happy, special, unforgettable moments captured in photographs & videos and forever remembered in our hearts.

chris is already in dubai since thursday morning...and now back i'm here.  and now we're back to our separate lives . him there, me here...*sigh*

i haven't unpacked yet--my stuff's scattered all over my room.  i have no pictures to share today, no photos of my stopover in singapore and no photos when i arrived here in sydney.  i somehow can't take a photo of anything since chris left for dubai and according to chris, he hasn't taken a photo of anything as well.  i guess we are both homesick for each other.

as of the moment, i'm feeling lost now that i'm back here.  dunno where or how i'm gonna start anew.  dunno what i'm gonna do first in order to organize everything again.  on top of it all,  i can't seem to describe what i'm really feeling right now.  happy, sad, i don't know.  i can't point it out exactly.  all i know is that i have to find my bearings again.  give me a day or two--or even a week.  just give me time.  i know i'll be back on my feet soon.  same thing with chris.  we'll be okay soon. 

to everyone who's waiting for photos...i'm sorry if it's taking us so long to upload them or have them developed.  we're also excited to share them with you (we really have a lot of good stuff to share with you especially from our honeymoon trips)...but please bear with us.  we just need to get back into our lives first before doing all these stuff. 

*sigh*  hope tomorrow the sun will shine brighter.

hey hey hey!

finally, finally...i'm now mrs. sanchez

still busy at the moment (honeymooning in bora as of today) so i'm just gonna leave a couple of snapshots for you....                                                           

chris and ivy sanchez

20 january 2007

photos by mel cortez (decisive moments)

// posted by ibyangbabe @ 2:54 PM 0 Comments

Labels: prenup shoot, wedding preps

oh. my. god.  i'm now at one of the best airports in the world and this place is HUGE.

we're about to board in a few minutes and in a few hours, manila here we come.

but this singapore stopover is one of the best stopover i've ever had. 

photos coming soon. 

 

Light looked down and saw the darkness.

"I will go there", said light.

Peace looked down and saw war.

"I will go there", said peace.

Love looked down and saw hatred.

"I will go there", said love.

So he,

the Lord of light, the Prince of Peace, the King of Love,

came down and crept in beside us.

---john bell

yesterday morning, i went to the shops and decided to buy myself a gift.  for some reason, i felt the need to give myself a christmas gift because when i evaluated my year this year..i wow(ed) me!  the word really is ACCOMPLISHED .  i have done so many things this year that i never imagined i would and i'm really proud of myself.

and so, happy christmas to me!!!

i really indulged myself this time...people close to me know that i can be so kuripot and even my tita asked me if it was on sale but my answer was no (yes, sometimes i'll only buy stuff if it's on sale).  i was glowing and beaming when i bought this.  even if it was a bit expensive for me (my first time to buy a really expensive watch) i didn't care.  for once this year, i forgot the adult in me and just became a child all over.  *sigh* i'm such a girl talaga.

and so you (yes, you!) buy something nice for yourself this christmas.  buy something you really really like.  you deserve it!!!!

// posted by ibyangbabe @ 8:08 AM 0 Comments

woohoo!!!!

i'm done with work for the year

the happiest part of the day was my boss kicked me out of the office early hahaha!  he told me to go home at 1:30pm and off i went to meet the afternoon sunshine with a beaming smile...ahhh life is so beautiful :)

and so i went to the chinatown to buy some more pasalubongs and then ended up meeting with my tita bess at blacktown.  we enjoyed talking over our frapuccinos and cheesecake at starbucks in order to unwind.  a very good way of ending the day and the year at work.

 

at past three in the afternoon, my workmate belinda, told me that she's gonna show me something.  so i thought it was work-related.  but she brought me to the lunchroom and boy was i surprised! 

all our workmates were there and there's this big chocolate cake on the table and there's chips all over.  it was an afternoon tea in honor of me (and chris)!!!!!

as in wow talaga!  i never expected anything of that sort.  i mean, all this time i've been really quiet about the wedding.  there's a few ones close to me that knew about it but i don't really talk about it much since the wedding isn't even happening here.

but they were so thoughtful...i was beaming when they were telling me that the afternoon tea is in honor of me and that they wish me and chris a happy marriage. 

and the best thing was, they even got me (us) a wedding present:

 

i was really touched by their gesture.  at first i was so speechless, i couldn't say a word.  i can't believe that they would do something like that for me.  but fortunately, i found my tongue (haha!) and was able to tell them something about the wedding and about me and chris and it was their turn to be in awe.  finally, they knew about our love story and they were amazed to know that chris and i were able to handle our long distance relationship well. 

after our afternoon tea, we all went to our desks for awhile then one by one, we started going to the nearby pub to have drinks.  i had one beer (yech!).  i don't like beer but i had no choice because apparently the pub doesn't do cocktails (jologs!).  but i enjoyed an hour of chitchat with my workmates.  at one part of the conversation, they were talking about their 1st wedding, 2nd wedding, failed marriages, divorces, etc.  you might be thinking "what the fcuk?i'm getting married and these people are talking about failed marriages?"  but it's actually the opposite.  it's amusing to hear them talk about their marriage fiascos.  they talk about it as if it's the most natural thing on earth.

compared to us filipinos, some reaction would be "naku, sakal ka na" ---it has a negative vibe.  coming from a culture that believe in staying married for the rest of eternity, parang negative diba?.  but here, even after their failed marriages, they're still happy (i mean, of course, they probably had the worst time) and they're still happy to see a person get married. 

this is what i learned from aussies today:  that if you wanna get married, then get married!  enjoy it and love it while it last. if it fails, you get hurt, you get over it and one day you'll love again.  it's okay to fail and it's okay to try again.

some of my workmates decided not to get married again after the second marriage.  but what's important is that they were able to get over it and still be happy about life. 

so that's today for me...receiving and opening our first wedding gift and reading our first wedding card and learning a thing or two from the aussies. 

// posted by ibyangbabe @ 9:57 PM 0 Comments

i just saw abs-cbn's christmas infomercial...and i have to admit that i wanna spend christmas in the phils.  now i'm trying to figure out why i chose to go home on december 26.  it was mainly because it's a bit cheaper to go on a weekday and after december 25.  it's all financial reasons :(   damn, if i could just turn back time!  moral lesson:  next time i come home on a christmas season, i'm gonna be in manila BEFORE december 24.

and now seeing how beautiful the infomercial was, it brought tears in my eyes. i miss my family and friends in the phils waahhhhh!!!!! 

bakit kasi nakita ko pa 'tong infomercial na ito. 

people might wonder what's happening to me, why all of a sudden my entries these days don't have that happy tone. 

it's that time of year you know?  it's christmas and it's for family and friends getting together, enjoying each other's company and just being surrounded by people you really love and care about.  even if i play deadma, hindi ko ma-deadma eh.  lumalabas ang tunay kong nararamdaman.

and at this point in time, i have to admit that my strength is waning.  what keeps me going on is my sunny outlook in life (in general, i'm still a happy person) and my excitement to the things that will happen when i come home.  but other than that, i'm really very fragile at the moment.  anything can easily move me to tears.  kaya pati infomercial ng abs-cbn ay pinatulan ko na.  jusme talaga!  and take note, the weather here isn't helping ha?  it's gloomy and windy today, parang winter (shetness talaga hahaha).  hindi ko tuloy ma-feel na christmas dito.

pero sabi nga ng kanta:

"kahit na anong mangyari...ang pag-ibig sana ay maghari..sapat nang si hesus ang kasama mo...tuloy na tuloy pa rin ang pasko!"

amen.

as we celebrate our 4th anniversary today, i can't help but be proud that we surpassed one of the toughest challenges ever given to us as a couple---that is us being physically apart for more than a year.

before we left, i knew some friends (matatawag nga kayang friends?) of ours had doubts as to our relationship's endurance. some people thought that chris would find another girl when i leave or that i would find another guy out here. believe it or not, there are people close to us that never believed in us and in this relationship. it hurt when i learned of these speculations. i never told chris about this (ngayon nya lang malalaman thru this entry). a bigger part of me played the art of deadma and apparently i completely forgot about it (til now).

the thing was, at that time, there were so many things on our minds (and until now marami pa rin kaming iniisip) so i didn't wanna focus on the negatives anymore. anyway, it's just speculations and some people just wanna bring you down so ba't ko papatulan?

when i got my permanent residency visa from the australian embassy and when he got a job in dubai, the first thing that crossed our minds was: matutupad na ang mga pangarap natin!!!! we were so positive even if we knew we'd have to be apart. all we ever thought about then was our dreams (as individuals and as a couple) coming true and our need to focus on what is important to us rather than the fear of being away from each other.

of course, we were sad. we have been together for quite awhile and we were so used to being there for each other physically. but we had to think of our future, the kind of life we want to have, the family that we want to nourish and the fulfillment of our so-called missions in life.

before we left the phils, we agreed to one thing: to focus on our goals and to be happy even if we're apart. and with so much faith and hope in our hearts, we survived 14 months of separation.

14 long months, but full, beautiful months. and as we prepare for our homecoming in manila, we have no doubt that the sacrifice to be apart was one of the best decisions we have made as a couple because we were able to fulfill our dreams and at the same time we are able to help other people along the way. and most importantly, this experience has taught us valuable lessons that will forever be a part of us.

we have learned the value of sacrifice. that even if we miss each other so much, we only talk on the phone once a week in order to save money. the only exceptions would be if there was an emergency or a pressing matter that can't wait. other than the phone calls, we had to make our own little sacrifices in order to save money so we'll have a nice start-off in our married life. we both rarely go out with friends (less gimik, less gastos), we always bring food to work so we won't have to buy lunch, we rarely shop for clothes and shoes and we monitor all our expenses (as in naka-excel format pa yan hahaha). other than all these, the biggest sacrifice is to leave the life we built in the philippines and start anew in a foreign land. plus, we had to leave our loved-ones behind. pagdating sa part na'to, we sometimes can't help but shed a tear. we really miss our family and friends in the phils so much.

we learned to be more responsible and independent. that even if we knew we had each other, we had to fend for ourselves and stand with our own feet. we had to be happy. we had to be okay. we had to learn and do things on our own. we had to function as efficiently as we can even if we're alone. we had to be one whole person so we can be a better couple together. when one of us is feeling lost, one had to say "kaya mo yan kahit wala ako dyan". after sometime, we realized that being responsible and independent has a bonus---that is you learn to love yourself and discover that you love your own company. we discovered that happiness should come from within, that we never have to depend on each other just to be happy.

we learned to respect and trust each other more. even if we're engaged, i never just call him whenever i want to. i respect his time so i ask him first on when's the best time to call him. we don't even have a rule on correspondence (e.g. that we have to email once a day). if one of us never emails for a day or two, we let it pass. if a phone call is running late, we readily give our benefit of the doubt for the other person.

so what is our secret on how this relationship worked given the distance and time difference????

very simple, we never took each other seriously.

we have issues every now and then. we sometimes do not agree on things. we miss each other so much. a million times we thought of flying to each other's countries if only for one kiss or embrace. on top of everything else, we are also working on our wedding preparations. we have our fears. we sometimes have doubts and insecurities. sometimes, nanghihina na rin kami sa lungkot.

and there's a couple more things we have gone through these past 14 months. madami pa, but we never keep count, we never make lists, we rarely fight about our issues (we had two major fights at wedding-related pa). we never took things (trivial or not) seriously. when we talk about our concerns or issues or dramas in life, we end our conversation with "o sige, tawa muna tayo bago ibaba ang phone". and it works that way. there's no pressure on this relationship. sa dami ng hirap na dinanas namin habang magkalayo kami, wala kaming inisip kungdi ang mga katuparan ng pangarap namin at ang mga taong pwede naming matulungan kung matupad man ang mga pangarap na ito. we did whatever's the next indicated thing and we never sweat it. our hearts and minds are focused only on the goal.

this is one basic truth that i need to share: long distance relationships are not for everyone---and no one is an exception to this rule. married or not, there are people who really can't endure this. this is a fact, long distance relationships are only for the strong-hearted.

after the wedding, chris and i will be apart again and i know the second time will be more painful because we will part as husband and wife. of course, i want to start our life together ASAP. of course, i want to have an apartment with him so we can play house. and of course, i want to be a mom soon. but we have to wait and sacrifice a bit more. and i know even if we're married, we may have separations like this again (there's a british businessman who has expressed that he'd like chris to work for their london office, naloka ang beauty ko pero super natuwa rin ako kasi at least may ibang gustong magbigay ng job opportunity kay chris). in a way, we invite adventure in our lives so we'll see where our dreams will take us. and at the end of the day, we just pray to god, lifting all our wishes and worries to him. we're letting his will be done.

as i end my entry, let me just give a very special message to my one and only life partner:
chris, thank you so much for making me so happy...for becoming the man that you are now...for sharing your life with me...for sharing your dreams with me and for supporting my dreams, some of which they come true because of you...for giving me strength in times when i need it badly...for giving me so much peace in this lifetime...for teaching me the value of sharing and forgiveness...for teaching me the value of foresight...for simply loving me the best way you can. thank you for four beautiful years, baby! happy happy happy anniversary! i love you always.

Labels: chris